Keeping up with the Jones', BDSM style...

When i first discovered bdsm and the on-line world, i was still on AOL. For a long time, my "research" was restricted to AOL chat rooms. i just wasn't aware of a whole lot more. At some point, an acquaintance introduced me to a wonderful support site for female submissives. It was an amazing group of women and I learned a lot about myself through participating in that group. It was a support group, there was no competition (at least i never saw any signs of it), we were learning and experimenting together. It was understood that we would all be into different things (be it humiliation, puppy play, extreme bondage, what have you) and have different pain and experience levels. As i got more knowledgeable about myself, bdsm, and html; i created a web page. It was some place where i could share what i had learned, post stories, etc. i linked to other bdsm sites from other people i had come to know, and they linked to my site. It was fun.

i got away from all that for a long while. Then, i started exploring the whole blog concept and decided to create my own. Before i created this one, and even now that it exists, i enjoy going out to other bdsm blogs (especially blogs written by submissives). As i read, i find that a lot of them scare me. i am very glad that i am not a new submissive going out on the Internet to find myself. i think i would consider myself a failure (Although, i know that Sir would never consider me one).

For example, i consider myself a bit of a pain slut (although that varies depending on the time of the month). There are times where i really truly crave pain. But, i could never take the pain that i "see" other submissives taking via their blogs. i find myself becoming envious and in awe at them. i see how much they are willing to take for their Masters and i feel sad, knowing that there is no way i could do that, it is unfathomable. And i believe these women to be telling the truth without exaggeration--they include photographs in their blog entries that pretty much back up what they are saying. They're absolutely beautiful.

Then, there are the blogs that i read in disbelief. These are the ones that i hope a new sub never reads. These are the ones that are obviously works of fiction, but are put out there are fact. Women who claim to let their Master drown them until they pass out, starve them for days or weeks at a time, put them in a small coffin for weeks at a time, even hang high from a tree over night by one ankle while the rest of her body is hog tied into some bizarre form. It is just totally freaky. i hope that no one reads any of those blogs, thinks they are factual and then feels badly about her self.

While i don't go for the whole "sisters in submission" thing, i do think that as submissives, we should try and support each other and remember this isn't about competition. This is about being happy with who you are in the relationship you are in. And, about pleasing Your Master/Dom while being yourself.